What’s Really Holding You Back from Leading Well?
What’s Really Holding You Back from Leading Well?
Do you ever have this nagging feeling like you’re meant to do more…
to lead, to influence, to make an impact… but something keeps holding you back?
As a believer, you know that God has a plan and a purpose for your life. Yet, you are also aware that you are not fulfilling it. You want to lead. You want to influence others and make a lasting impact in their life. But, life is so busy and day after day passes and you are still hesitating, waiting, and just annoyed by the feeling of “more”.
If that’s you, I want you to know… you are not alone.
Most Christian women feel called to more but struggle to fully step into it. And the truth is, what’s holding you back is often not what you think.
Let’s talk about it.
Okay, here’s the question – Why are you not rising up and becoming the leader God created you to be?
1. Could it be that you are believing something that is simply not true?
Your thoughts could be your biggest problem. They could be limiting you and causing you to stay stuck. Are you thinking thoughts like…
I don’t know enough
I need more time
I’m not ready
someone else could do it better
These thoughts are determining how you feel. You feel like I cannot do it. The feeling that you cannot do it drives your actions or in this case your inaction. Which yields zero results.
But what if you changed your thoughts?
Stop believing your thoughts as if they are reality. Take them captive. Line them up with the truth of God’s word. And replace them with truth.
New Thought (truth): For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. (Philippians 4:13)
Now how does that make you feel?
What action will you now take?
And what will the result of that be?
It is true – change your thoughts and you can change your life.
The problem is as old as time. We have an enemy that hisses in our ear the same way he did to Eve when he simply hissed, “Did God really say…?”
Eve’s doubt, her fear, her thoughts which lead to her action changed the course of time.
Your thoughts are leading your life. If we want to follow Jesus, we must choose to think thoughts that are obedient to His word. The other thoughts get captured and locked away.
When you change your thoughts, you will begin to change how you lead.
2. Could it be you are waiting.
What if He is waiting on you? Don’t use waiting as an excuse. If He has said “move” don’t wait.
Stop waiting for:
more clarity
more confidence
more time
the “right moment”
You have begun your own stumbling block. (sorry, but it’s true) Stop holding yourself back and waiting on God to prove what He wants you to do one more time. If you already know – own it.
Faith looks like taking one step of obedience at a time - not knowing what the step after that one will be. Take step one and He will reveal the next step.
You see, the fact that we don’t know the 5 year plan, we don’t know where this will lead is why faith is required. We move forward not in our own strength or ability but in His power and His strength.
You don’t need more. You need to use what God has already given you and taught you. God is ready to start using you right where you are with what you have.
Confidence doesn’t come before you step out. It comes because you step out.
3. Could it be You’re Avoiding Discomfort
We love comfort.
We want to live in leggings and a sweatshirt with our weighted blanket in our lap. We want to be comfortable. We are content to live in our comfort zone.
So we avoid…
having hard conversations
making decisions
stepping out when you’re unsure
being seen and sometimes misunderstood
You cannot lead well and stay comfortable.
Imagine Peter walking on the water with Jesus. Wow! What an incredible experience. But can you imagine how uncomfortable it must have been to throw his leg over the side of that boat, to step onto the crashing waves, and to start walking away from the safety of the boat? What would he have missed had he stayed safe and secure like the others?
Are you holding back because you are simply avoiding the discomfort that comes with growth?
Growth requires stretching.
Leadership requires courage.
If you ever hope to become more and more like Jesus – you must be brave and courageous and take one step at a time with Him. He is there with you. He will not leave you.
Be a water-walker. Choose to be uncomfortable in your obedience. It’s a good place to be.
4. Could it be you are unclear.
When you’re unclear about your next steps, you will hesitate.
You’ll compare.
You’ll second-guess.
You’ll shrink back.
Here’s the truth: we can be certain there will be uncertainty.
This is why it is vital that we are reading our Bible, praying, leaning in, discerning, asking for wisdom, and growing to know God more. As we do, He will reveal more to us over and over again. So, we take the next step, and repeat the above as we wait for Him to reveal the next step.
We cannot always know what will happen next – but we can know that God will always be with us. He is our comfort, our guide, our provision, our protector, our defense. He is everything we need. We are not to be self-reliant – but fully reliant on Him.
We trust His way. We trust what He has done. We trust who He is.
Your clarity needs to be around who you are because of whose you are.
Your leadership is not random. You have an assignment
God does not call you to something and then leave you unequipped to walk it out.
So, what is it? What is holding you back and stopping you from stepping boldly into God’s plan for you?
Identify it. Be honest and vulnerable. And then take your next step.
Ask yourself…
What is one step I can take today to move forward in obedience?
You don’t have to have it all figured out.
You just have to take the next step.
I am praying for you.
And… If this spoke to you, I want you to know—you don’t have to figure this out on your own.
Scripture tells us to seek wise counsel. We see examples of pairs working together – a mentor and a mentee.
This is exactly why I created the Called to Lead Framework and my group coaching experience.
Inside, I walk with you step-by-step to help you:
gain clarity on your God-given calling
strengthen your mindset and confidence
and learn how to lead and influence others with intention
Because leadership isn’t something you stumble into—it’s something you develop.
And you were never meant to do it alone.
If you’re ready to stop holding back and start leading with clarity and confidence, I’d love to walk with you.
Learn more here: Called to Lead
Prefer to Listen?
You can listen to the full podcast episode about this topic. I had a lot to say that I couldn’t include here:
Episode 236: What’s Really Holding you Back from Leading Well?
Let’s Keep the Conversation Going
What resonated most with you from this post?
I’d love to hear from you—leave a comment or share this with a friend who’s ready to step into her calling.
Hi friend 🤍
If you’ve ever felt called to more… but unsure what your next step is—you are not alone.
My name is Pam Pegram, and I’m a Leadership and Personal Growth Coach who loves Jesus.
I help Christian women gain clarity, build confidence, and step into Christ-centered influence—at work, in their community, and at home.
Because you were never meant to just get by…
You were created to live with purpose, impact others, and walk fully in what God has for you.
Here’s what I believe:
If you are a believer, you are called to lead
Leadership is influence—being salt and light (Matthew 5)
It’s not about position, personality, or platform
It’s about living on purpose right where God has placed you
How do we do that?
Through the Called to Lead Framework, where we focus on:
✔️ The formation of you as a leader (identity, mindset, beliefs)
✔️ The formation of your leadership (connection, vision, influence)
✔️ The practical application of impacting others and leaving a legacy
Now that you’re here—let’s stay connected 🤍
👉 Start here: Take the “What’s Your Leadership Type?” Quiz
👉 Listen to the podcast: Confident Christian Influence - available on most podcast platforms
👉 Follow along on Instagram & join the community on Facebook
👉 Let me send you a simple framework that includes 4 shifts you can make todayl… L E A D Framework
I’m so thankful you’re here.